Working Stiffs
Copyright (c) 2006 by Edward J. Thomas, all rights reserved
Original Production
By Stagecrafters
October 12-21, 2007
Directed by Gwenn Samuel
Original Cast
MAGGIE/MARGARET - Crystal Brock
SANDY - Jeff Priskorn
FATHER TIME - Phil Berns
MOTHER EARTH - Sherita Humphrey
MOTHER NATURE - Meghan Mott
LIFE - Sandi Glover
DEATH - Joel Silverman
WAR - Steve Melling
SYNOPSIS
Comedy/Satire
3 men, 3 women, 2 either sex (9 characters total)
What does the coming Apocalypse mean for your employment status?
DEATH
It’s… Life.
MARGARET
Leif who?
DEATH
What do you mean, “Life who?”
MARGARET
Is it Leif Redmond? Leif Gerralt? Leif Erickson? I know hundreds of them, so you’ll have to be specific.
DEATH
No, you don’t get it…
MARGARET
And if I know his angel, maybe I can send along a heads-up. You know, let them know you’re coming.
DEATH
It’s not “Leif Somebody-or-other,” it’s Life. The Life.
MARGARET
Life?
DEATH
Yes.
MARGARET
But what does this mean?
DEATH
It means I have to harvest Life itself.
MARGARET
Yes, but what does that mean for the rest of us? For Maggie?
DEATH
Who’s Maggie?
MARGARET
She’s my person.
DEATH
Oh. Well, I suppose she’ll live out what she’s got left and then I’ll harvest her.
MARGARET
Then what?
DEATH
Then… nothing. That’ll be it. No more processing, no more recycling. No more Life. We’re getting ready to close up shop.
MARGARET
Oh no!
DEATH
Hence my dilemma.
MARGARET
Not just your dilemma. It’s all of ours! We’re about to be put out of a job!
DEATH
No, that’s not it.
MARGARET
What?
DEATH
My job is safe for at least more of the next century. The whole world isn’t going to drop dead all at once. Well, at least not until the End is officially scheduled. But that’s not for several years, I’m sure.
MARGARET
(Sarcastically)
Oh, well, as long as you’re secure.
DEATH
And I am.
MARGARET
What is the dilemma then, from your perspective?
DEATH
I’ve been working with Life for… well, forever. Or close to it.
MARGARET
Right.
DEATH
So how can I?
MARGARET
How can you what?
DEATH
How can I got through with it? We’ve worked together for so long, I can’t imagine going solo.
MARGARET
That’s it? You’re worried about your job changing when the rest of us are losing ours?
DEATH
Not everyone will be out of work right away.
MARGARET
There’s still going to be massive layoffs.
